Driving to South Dakota

So I woke up at Paul’s the day before Thanksgiving. The day Abby and I were going to leave for Rapid City. This was all supposed to be fun and silly. This was going to be all about Abby and I eating Thanksgiving Dinner in the car while we drove to a show. We were going to watch “It’s a Wonderful Life” in the car – I’d brought the mini DVD player!

But now she didn’t even want to go. I had such a bad feeling about everything. Even staying at Paul’s. The plan was for me to stay with him – seeing as Abby and I would likely kill each other. (Don’t get me wrong, we love each other, but we’re like sisters that way.) So I got out of bed – and I knew – I couldn’t stay.

I walked to get coffee. I wasn’t sad losing Portland. I actually felt relieved. It was a beautiful morning - played my iPod…


"Blessed is he who reads aloud the words of the prophecy
And blessed are those who hear
And who keep what is written therein
For the time is near…"

The parking lot was frozen! I “skated” around in my boots

"And I saw a beast rising out of the sea with ten horns and seven heads
And a blasphemous name upon its head
And all who dwell on earth will worship it
In vain

If anyone has an ear let him hear-
If anyone who slays with the sword,
Then he must be slain"


"Then, I saw a new heaven and a new earth
And I heard a great voice from the throne saying:
"Behold the dwelling of God is with men
He will dwell with them, and they shall be his people
And God himself will be with them
He will wipe away every tear from their eyes
And death shall be no more
Neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore
For these things will have passed away"

-Stop quoting from Madonna – quoting from The Book of Revelations---

"Do not seal up the words of the prophecy, for the time is near
Behold, I am coming soon"

-And right from that – the next rack is The Beginning of The End remixed. That’s right. This is The Beginning of The End. I am ending this now! I got coffee, and I talked it all over with Lucas and Jen. After that I felt much better, and was totally secure in my decision.

Then, Abby called, and said she felt up to going. No shit. So I went over to help her pack. I told her about Portland. All of a sudden she didn’t want to do Portland or Vegas. “Dork you have a FRONT ROW seat!! You can’t not go!!!”

Pot calling the kettle that I am, I arranged things so that I could go home on the 1st. It felt bad – like killing off a part of myself but I knew in the end it was the right thing to do.


So we packed up. While Abby was packing, I played around with her Practice Poi. It was fun. She packed them and we left. She totally looked like Linnus with her Blue Blanket. If you saw the drawing on my last post, you’ll understand why both she and I have a thing with Peanuts.

(As Abby puts it – “Lucy was the original groupie” given the way she hung at the end of Schroeder’s Piano)

Come on Fish Mox! I called to her. (Come on, as if she was really going to escape that nickname!


So I started out driving. Abby curled up under her blanket, since she was sick. I kept drinking mad amounts of Vitamin water. Normally I’m not down with Vitamin Water – calories and all – but I had to do everything I could to keep from getting Abby’s Strep throat! Lukas swears by the Vitamin water so I figured what the hell. Worst case maybe power of suggestion will keep me from getting sick. (Plus it’s the holidays and I’m gonna gain like a lot, I already have –who cares! Having boobs in December is always fun but now I really digress…)

So driving out of Seattle was really beautiful, and also bitter sweet. We drove past Key Arena – where the tour had started. Back when everything was innocent and fun….

We left Seattle around 1. The plan had always been to drive through the night and hit Rapid City at noon the next day. From there we’d take goofy pics and have Thanksgiving Dinner. Now that I was doing most of the driving, I knew it would be hard… but I was ready.

Second star to the left – straight on till morning.


It was a lovely drive – even though Abby wasn’t really talkative…


Look how cute she is – just like Linus sucking her thumb almost even!

Actually I was nervous that Fish Mox over there was going to start growing gills halfway through the trip. I had to keep checking. Don’t wanna end up in the middle of Montana bumble fuck – stranded next to The Fish Lady.


But Abby was fin for the most part. She was even up to driving after a while.


Actually I think she mostly started driving so’s she wouldn’t have to listen to my music. Yeah I don’t think she was down with my mixes of Madonna – Confessions Tour and Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D.


She was playing Smashing Pumpkins. I’m not a big Pumpkins fan. But I’d played several of their songs every day for months back in the spring - as part of a mix I would play while I was writing. I was getting sad and nostalgic for those days. I missed the era before the tour – when I had so much to look forward to and got so much work done….

"Shakedown 1979, cool kids never have the time
On a live wire right up off the street
You and I should meet
Junebug skipping like a stone
With the headlights pointed at the dawn"

If I go home – I can start to go back to all that….


The sun started to set…


Then Abby said – “Um, what happened to the sky?”


“Huh?”


“What the hell!?” in the course of 2 minutes – the song hadn’t even finished – the sky went completely dark.


We drove into the Dark Cloud…. Fucking creepy…


We stopped where Abby told me The Gorge was. Jrod – another fan had been telling me so much about it. The view from where we were was insane…


We laughed at the tour bus for obvious reasons….


We got back into the car and continued to drive into the dark cloud. And that was it. We wouldn’t see the sun for over 12 hours.


Not only was it dark – it was foggy.


“What the hell?” We were both weirded out. It was only 4:30 pm. Yet both of us felt like it was at least 8:30 – if not closer to 10. Remember kids, I was on New York time, and she was deathly ill…


Where are we? We kept driving. Abby put on Nina Simone. The music was beautiful and her voice is incredible… mixed with the dark blue foggy landscape it was all so surreal.

"Black is the color of my true love's hair
His face is like roses so fair
He's the prettiest face
And the neatest of hands
I love the ground on where he stands

Oh I love my love
The winters passed.."


"Well once I lived the life of a millionaire
Spending my money, I didn't care
Takin' my friends out for a mighty good time
Buyin' boot leg liquor, champagne and wine"

We kept driving – and for at least two or three miles we drove past this farm – with these creepy Christmas lights. And all of them were doing something slightly perverted. What the fuck – we weren’t even out of Washington yet… Still Nina sang and it was all so out of place – yet fit perfectly…

"Then I began to fall so low
Couldn't find me no friends
Had no place to go
If I ever get my hands on a dollar again
I'm gonna hold on to it, till the eagle grins"



"Alabama's gotten me so upset
Tennessee made me lose my rest
And everybody knows about Mississippi Goddam

-You thought I was kidding! -
This is a show tune
But the show hasn't been written for it, yet

Lord have mercy on this land of mine
We all gonna get it in due time"


I took back over driving. I was sleepy and cold. But I had my CD’s and I was OK. I texted Lucas to let him and Jen know where we were and that Abby was OK. He texted back “Are YOU ok!?” I stretched the truth and said yes. I got into the car, Abby fell asleep instantly. I wrapped myself up in blankets and started to drive.

"We see no change in sight
Watching her decline
She gets on a midnight plane
She's done it a thousand times

When love starts out in the darkness
It doesn't do well in the light
Affairs of the heart
That start out in the dark
Usually stay with the night!"



I’m OK… Yeah right.

"Now I can tell you about the place I belong
You know it won't last long
And all those lights they will turn down
Let it will be
Oh let it be
Just let it be

Now I can see things for what they really are
I guess I'm not that far
I'm at the point of no return

Just watch me BURN"


"Temporarily pacify this -"

The Hollow acoustic live version…. All the tracks turning more mellow until it reached Still mixed with Ghosts. All the while driving up winding mountain roads – unable to see more then fifteen feet in front of the car through the dark and the fog. Constantly going around curves where hills came up to the snow – I could make out the pine trees and the snow off to the side – just barely…

Abby woke up to ask if I was OK. I was…until And All That Could have been went into Light in The Sky – then to Corona Radiata. By the time Four of Us Are Dying came on – I was near hallucinating.


So then we stopped again to get gas…. Um….. this photo should explain everything.
Abby took over. She put on her music and drove for a little.

"You should be stronger then me.
Don’t you know you’re s’posed to be the man…

Always have to talk it through – I’m OK
Always have to comfort you – everyday

Feel like a lady – and you my Lady Boy!"

--“Abby – This is like your relationship with Rob!”

“Oh my god exactly!” See I had this connection with Amy the first time I heard this song!”

Amy? Oh so THAT’s Amy Whinehouse! Wow! She IS pretty good! All I ever heard was that crappy one on the radio where it sounds like she’s mooing over some pre-recorded crappy organ music they play at the mall. So there I learned about Amy whinehouse – and how to drive Mario Cart Style when you can’t see the road. Abby taught me a lot about driving…

We stopped in Missoula, you know where the band was set to play the next week. All one street and two stoplights of it. We both decided to cal it a night. It was about 10:30, but felt like 3 am. We knew we weren’t going to be able to do the funny Deadwood/Mount Rushmore photos anymore. Fuck it. So we got a room and set the alarm for 5 am….