Riot's Rock Legend: Second Star to the Right

After the Rapid City Show, we had planned to drive to Billings as a team, but Amy, Abby and I got separated from Brandi and Marie, and would spend the rest of the night worrying about them.

Of course I had to get an Iced Coffee for the road…

It was a long drive but we were wide-awake after the awesome show. Amy and I talked the whole time. She’s amazing and taught me a lot about Pearl Jam and going to shows.

It was a long dark drive. There were so many stars – I saw a shooting star fly right in front of us at one point…

yeah it was a long dark drive through Wyoming. We didn’t sop much because well, ever see Deliverance?

Finally we reached Billings. A few of the Semis were already there – but no Brandi or Marie. Abby was sick still and checked into the hotel.

Amy and I hung by the arena waiting for the other two. Amy dozed while I wrote in my journal. Finally the reality of my last show being only a few hours away was beginning to set in, and I was getting weepy.

The lack of sleep from the all night drive was also beginning to set in. See I look like I hadn’t slept. Of course all that lack of sleep was only going to make me more emotional and cry even worse during the show…oh boy.

Finally at some point Brandi and Marie made it to the venue. I was so happy to see them. Around about that time, something terrible happened. I was getting something out of my bag, when I felt my Lights in The Sky Necklace catch on something as I stood up. Then I heard something hit the ground.

Oh God!

I’d broken it! Every show! For every show of the tour, I’d worn that necklace, and every pit – even the war that was Lollapalooza it had survived! I’d made it just before the first show in Seattle – and now on my last snow it was broken. Of course I started to cry – just then Brandi came over. She is easily the most cheerful person I know. “Don’t worry!” She told me with a smile, “It’s in no way an omen at all.” She’s like a ray of sunshine and I don’t mean that sarcastically at all. I felt much better having her there. So I picked up the broken piece and put my poor broken necklace in a safe place.

Yeah… Billings was a pretty bleak place. There were trees and I imagined they could be pretty in the spring, but front the look of the place it seemed spring would never come there. Billings seemed to be in a state of Perpetual Nuclear Winter. There was something creepy about the whole place…

Creepy or not, it was Christmas and I had it all planned out to decorate the barricade for the night. About the same time I made the garland, I was crashing really bad from the lack of sleep. Marie had brought me a blanket from the car and I tried to nap. It was cool, because we all got to wait inside again.

See here we are inside. Isn’t that hill behind us insane?

There exposed so you can see everyone! Once again it was a massive Pre-Sale line. I think there were 10 of us up until doors.

I was so tired, I was starting to feel all hollow and shaky. I couldn’t sleep so I decided to try some of the new tricks Abby had taught me the day before. I was still terrible, but I felt much better to be up and doing something.

Plus I had a lot of fun spinning to Capital G Remixed and Madonna and all.

And then I got to peak in at the stage set up, which is always exciting! I don’t care how many shows I do, it’s like the first time every time. And just then I remembered. I was supposed to hit 49 shows by the end of the tour, saving my 50th for some time special, like when Lukas and Jen would be with me - or Europe or something. Now it would only be 48, all these little things you start to realize when things change… Still I had one more show – and I was terribly grateful…

I was getting excited as it got late in the afternoon. I went out and took pictures.

The place was beautiful, and a haunting sorta way…

You know, one you got passed the smoke stacks and all. Wait, how does the song go?

“The Sky is painted black – the smoke pours out the stack!?” -

-Yeah it does…

This is the view from our room – last minute getting ready-

-the sun turning everything the most beautiful colors, late afternoon sun – pre-show exhilaration.

We went back in the arena. Nothing to do now but wait. Lying on the ground, I looked up at the ceiling and thought of all the things/people I would be seeing for the last time. My eyes welled up and I tried not to cry. My head was back so I tried to keep the tears from leaving my eyes. Don’t need to cry off my make up before the show even starts! Brandi and everyone told me not to cry. They made me laugh and smile. I got up to take pictures outside of the setting sun.

Anything I can do creative… the easiest way to start to feel OK again. I’d gotten a hold of myself and stopped crying. I went back inside – they were sound checking – at the first set of notes I froze dead in my tracks

I ran to the doors – No way!

Ghosts 28!

My ABSOLUTE favorite song off Ghosts! I NEVER thought I would hear it live! Even if they did not play it that night – I was hearing it then. I stood with my head against the door – so much for not crying.

Checking to see if I’d cried off any make up. I donno…I don’t look so good here. Oh come on it was 28! 28!!! Despite all the tears - I was a happy girl. Fuck I could have gone home at that and still been happy!

Abby came over for the first all day to pick up the tickets since they were in her name. She gave me mine, then went back to the room. I was sad she wasn’t coming.

We got let by JT in and we waited to go down to the floor. There were A LOT of laughs about Honyacks and Whoopleheads, and a lot of other inside jokes. We laughed A LOT. It was that over-tired everything’s funny kinda laughing at shit too!

So then JT is about to let us in. He opens the door to the arena and who else is there but Justin! Someone needs to put a bell on that one! He’s everywhere. I didn’t say hi or nothing ‘cuz as nice as he is and as much as I’m almost not afraid of him, I didn’t want to like bug him when he was out taking pics or whatever…