Disney Weekend Part 3: The Magic Kingdom and Stuff

How Happy was I to be in my little kid's sized Tinkerbell Dress?! Both the finally having the shinny, bright-green, glittery dress after all those fuckin years - and the fact that I fit into little childrens sizes! Ok, so it was a little short on me - but thats OK - it was hot out!!


Here I am with my will' baby Jack outside the hotel on my way to the part.


Ahhh! It’s Pala Ferry where The Others kidnapped Jack!! Oh no wait, I’m in the wrong song…. No – from Pala Ferry I took the boat over to The Magic Kingdom and met up with my two nephews Dyaln and Jack. Dude, Dylan was mad cuz any time he like ran into me to tackle me or something he was all covered in glitter. Hahaha! No but like My brother and sister in law were awesome – and they got us guides for the day! So like – they got us fast passes and it was insane and we didn’t wait on line all day. And you know me and all my being experienced at waiting on lines.

It was weird, but kinda nice in the end. Especially since there was 16 people in the group and three small children. The only real line drama occurred when it came time to go on the rides and like – who was gonna sit with what family members didn’t get along kinda thing came up. 90% of the time I lucked out ‘cuz the boys kept wanting to go with Aunt Carol – and the other 10% I made my Momma go on rides with me. (What that Snow White ride is scary!) Then me and my Momma talked shit about everyone else while we were on the rides its was awesome! No I’m only kidding-we didn’t do that…..


Um. Oh my god. I have nothing more to say about this. Its just awesome.


Hellz yeah! Sleepy Hollow!


Ok so, one of the first rides we went on all day was The Haunted Mansion.


Oooooooooooooo

-and I want you


No seriously! Check out this wall paper!!

Ooooooooooo

-and I want you!

Oooooooo

-and I want you

Ooooooooo

AND I WANT YOU!

Hahahahahahhaha!


Yeah, I totally sang that when we were going through the Haunted Mansion.


Oh come on – how could I not!


Hahahahha


You are the Perfect Drug the Perfect Drug The Perfect Drug


See – theres lil Dylan pointing at the Ghosts. (heheh I said Ghosts). Now I just noticed this – Look what finger Dylan’s pointing with! I SWEAR I didn’t teach him that!


So this is me later in the Liberty Square area – on a porch in a rocking chair. All I needed was my shot gun. I was a happy girl.


Ok so late in the day all the kids started crashing and everyone split up. My brother and sister in law were in The Grand Floridian still since they were there for the work thing – they were switching to The Wilderness Resort with the rest of us the next day. But – I went back with them to their hotel for a while – since that way I’d get to go on the Monorail – Cool!! I also really wanted to see that hotel – it looked so cool – just like in Some Like it Hot!


See look there’s The Grand Floridian from the Monorail.


Holy FUCK and I thought our hotel was nice!!!!


For Real!?! This place was INSANE! I was about to go with my brother and sister and law and the boys back to the room – but it had a BEACH! So I ran outside to the beach while the kids and the adults changed for dinner. (Dude – I so wasn’t changing out of my Tinckerbell Dress!)


Look! Look it’s the PURPLE monorail!!!


Look! Its Just like Some like it hot! You can just see that scene where Marilyn Monroe and Tony Curtis and Jack Lemmon climb back into the hotel at night – even thought its totally shot during the day! I love it!


“'Not Tonight Josephine!'”






Being on the beach was nice – then I went back inside…and I waited for everyone to come back down from the room. A set of siblings all around 12 years old walked by in Polo and Ralph Lauren. They looked at me funny. Of course by then I’d already been feeling out of place standing next to the very expensive soap store and all the other boutiques…


Yeah I was feeling the evil eyes, and I felt like the unwanted party guest and I was really hoping my family would get down there so I could get out sooner. Sometimes you just feel like the dirty teenage goth girl in the Disney version of the country club and its not the most comfortable feeling in the world exactly…


Whew doot doo doo….this is awkward. But finally this crazed little red haird boy came flying across the lobby – only I was attacked from behind by a rabid growling blond boy. So me and Dylan and Jack were joined by my brother and sister in law – and we got on the monorail and headed for the Polynesian Resort for dinner.


The Polynesian Diner thing was cool! It was all family style. I even had a few lil pieces of actual food with my Luna bar.


I got Layed! I learned the Hula too!

Diner was funny as hell! There were so many dirty jokes and innuendos!


I even Drank a Light up Cocktail. I figured I’d be safe, what with it being Disney I was certain it would be watered down seeing as they’re all…you know not wanting tipsy guests in Mickey Utopia. That wouldn’t be PC, so I figured it would be watered down and couldn’t have too many calories. I was right – in fact I doubt there was any actual alcohal in there at all!

Ooop- look there’s Stef – my sister in Law! Heh – shhhh I said I wasn’t gonna get the famly in there – so don’t anybody say anything. Hi Stef!!!


So the next day was my last day… or morning even since I was leaving after breakfast to fly home. Everyone met up at the Contemporary Resort for the Character Breakfast where all the kids eat food and Mickey and Friends come over to the table. The food thing was really funny. Its like this INSANE buffet with every breakfast food possible – and then some – AND dessert food! No no – people are all eating piles of eggs and bacon and pancakes – and then they had fucking brownies and cake and shit!

Dude, I love it, my brothers are all telling the kids – eat your breakfast and then you can have desert. The kids had to finish pancake and syrup – and then eat cookies! How funny is that – look the kids eat cereal – with candy then get to meet Mickey – it really is like kid Utopia!


Aww – look I had Riot food for breakfast! Teeehehehehe. Hey man - I don't sqeeze into wee lil kids clothes eating waffles! (As mentioned in previous blogs I have issues. You can laugh its OK we all laugh about it now.)


Aww look at lil Jacky – he kept hiding under his Goofy hat. So Mickey came around and was signing autographs – and Dylan and Connor jump up cuz they see Donald – and they get so excited and start screaming about Donald Duck. Oh boy – Mickey was looking so offended. So I jumped up – cuz I felt bad and I gave Mickey a Hug (No I didn’t do a repeat of Chip and Dale it stayed PG with Mickey)

I was all – “Don’t worry Mickey – I still love you.” Yeah, Mickey kinda had a thing for me after that I think cuz after the kids got their pics taken with him Mickey made me go back over so I could get a pic. Yeah – me and Mickey are practically BFF now


Shhh, just don’t tell Trent. I don’t want him to get the wrong idea.



(Not even Mickey can replace you TR – I fly to see you soon I promise.)