Rock Star Thanksgiving Pt. 1

Thanksgiving around here raises a few interesting questions. For example, what exactly does a band and a small army of its fans living in a secluded estate do for Thanksgiving? Well kids, we do the same thing everyone else does – eat food and drink alcohol when the family (or in our case other fans) gets on our nerves!

Of course, there’s no catering when we’re not on tour, so somebody’s gotta cook. Guess who cooked dinner for everyone! Yeah that’s right me. So, I thought, I would share some of my recipes. Here’s my special recipe for cornbread that I totally made up.

Stuffing

Serves 24
2 1 8-inch pan of cornbread. Cut into cubes.
18 slices of hearth bread, cubed
5 stalks celery, sliced
2 yellow onions, finely chopped
2 cups dried cranberries
20 apple rings, chopped
1 jar (14.8 oz.) French chestnuts
6 Tbs. chopped fresh sage
6 Tbs. chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley
3 bay leafs
2 tsp dried thyme
Salt, to taste
Ground pepper, to taste
2 cups chicken or vegetable broth
1 more cup

The day before Thanksgiving:
While you cook, go for a marathon of Daniel Bolye movies “28 Days Later” & “The Beach” are great Thanksgiving Classics. Plus “The Beach” has one of the coolest end titles sequences of all time. Cut up the bread around noon into 1-inch cubes. Put all the bread into a basket and cover it loosely with paper towels. Impress your family by showing them the deserted shots of London and learn some new foreign terms. For example “Budgens” = British super market.



That Selnea's awsome!

The day of Thanksgiving:
By now, you should be watching the parade, and playing your own music, because three minutes in you will have remembered how much you hate the hokey show tunes. I recommend David Bowie’s live BBC performance, and “Season Song” by Blue States (You’ll remember this as the closing theme from “28 Days Later”)






Chop up the onions and the celery. Melt 4 tablespoons butter in a large skillet over medium-low heat. Or screw the butter and just use Pam. Add onion and celery. Cook until vegetables until they smell nice and are pretty golden brown. Put them into a small Tupperware in the fridge for later.

Spread cornbread and hearth bread on a cookie sheet and bake until its brown and crunchy, this should take a half hour. While you wait - Watch some fun floats and do a little dance to the time honored classic Thanksgiving tune – “Bella Lugosi’s Dead” by Bauhaus (Though, I highly recommend the version that features TV on The Radio, Trent Reznor and Uncle Peter Murphy). One the bread is cooked, return it to the basket with the paper towels and be careful not to drop the crumbs on the nice clean floor. “Oh! Bella! I’m dead I’m dead I’m dead!”

Now mix together the cranberries and all the dried herbs. Mix that up, put it in a Tupperware and set it aside.

Almost dinnertime. By now you should be good and toasted from the Wassail (see recipe). If not, hurry up and chug! Get a small saucepan and heat 2 cups of broth. Once it gets warm, and the celery and onion mix. Do your best to ignore family members (or in my case groupies) who by now will surely be pestering you as to how long it will be until dinner. No matter what tell them a half hour! (Although you and I well know it will be a lot closer to 2 hours!) Stir the onions a while and switch to the cranberry cocktail. It’ll hit you quicker. Now add the cranberry and seasonings mix to the stock. Let that simmer on the lowest heat on the back burner a while.

Have other family members (or in my case band members) deal with the turkey. Cut up 2 granny smith apples and don’t worry about being precise or “slow” when doing so. Add the apples to a big pot. Then add the chestnuts. Now very carefully put all the bread chunks into the pot and stir the mix.

As soon as the Turkey is out, and the oven is free - Add one more cup of broth directly to the dry mix and very quickly add the shit from the stove. Mix that well. Put all the stuffing into a big ‘ol foil pan or something and bake it in a 350°F oven for 30 minutes, or until brown and crispy.



Riot’s Helpful Thanksgiving Tip

Don’t let Stupid NBC try to trick you. After the parade is over, they will lie to you and tell you that the Westminster pussy cunt Dog show is a Holiday tradition, which as we all know is complete and total bullshit. Anyone who was born within the over 3 years ago knows damn well the only holiday traditional thing to watch after the parade is “It’s a Wonderful Life.” Heehaw - come on now. Dog show my ass. There’s nothing like a bunch of leather clad industrial rockers and their fans getting all weepy over Jimmy Stewart hollerin' about his bleeding lip to put you in the holiday spirit. “Mary! Mary! AW KIDS!!!” Yeah, that’s right, Papa Celeste.

So while you’re getting out the Bauhaus burnt Cds from Sa Lews, don’t forget to bring down the Special Edition DVD of “It’s a Wonderful Life”, and pop that in after Santa makes his Grand Entrance on Herald Square. Santa – now there’s one Crazy Diva Rock Star. (Don’t worry Papa Celeste; you’ll always be our favorite. Santa can’t bring us what we really want for Christmas anyways; only you and your blessed pre-sales can do that!)

Modwheelmood

I have this thing. I get weird about naming names. I feel weird even using code names for people. I used to be ok with that at least. My experiences with bands had become a distant past – a nightmare that never really happened.

Of course it did, and sadly, it’s all happening again. What the fuck, I have no control anymore! My real life is stranger then my fiction! So for today’s post, I am going to use a real name – for the best possible reason. I want to promote this other great band called Modwheelmood.

So, my friend De Vars and I went out to see some bands a few weeks back – De Vars just passed the Bar Exam by they way! She’s a full-fledged lawyer now!! In another odd fuck twist of fate, she is with the same law firm as my brother! Everyone congratulate her and buy her a drink!

So, she takes me to see some bands – as it turns out – one of those bands was Modwheelmood. You see kids, one of the members of Modwheel, is currently in…THE band. And on top of that, another band member, was also at the bar spinning all night. So needless to say, the place was packed with Status Gard! Yep, it was a mini army of rock stars fans!

Imagine going out for a quick lil mellow night at the bar -- and the entire family shows up! And then it’s this big CMJ thing, you know… So, I apologize, to everyone! I wasn’t quite prepared to be social that night – but I had a great time with ‘yall anyway!

So here’s a shot of De Vars watching Modwheelmood’s lovely performance.



Whoops! Ha ha, I’m not gonna post of photo of her! (she might kick me in the ass.)

Modwheelmood was great I love the Modwheel – they have a myspace, and their first 2 cd’s are available on I-tunes. My favorite track is called “Things will Change”. Go download it.

Oh yea, and uh, I totally acted goofy in the presence of band members – but that’s totally De Vars’ fault because she totally forced me to drink Bacardi!

San Francisco Day 4

Day two of the Bridge school benefit. Day two started a bit earlier. My partner in crime, “Baya Malay,” and I headed off to the show in day light hours! And again, rembemeber, we were all very out of our element. You must picture our Dark Lord, a highly electronic Rock Star, playing amoungst Neil Young, and so many other renowned folk acts with acoustic guiters – in the DAY LIGHT! And then there was the guy with a string quartet! Such a strange senario.

So early on, we were watching the line of fans going in. After the nightmares – the horrible memories of the Chaos caused the notorious Safuaevalkyrie and her crew – which I ought not speak of now – Baya Malay and I were prepared for anything! However, given a line of fans, come to support Neil & Peggy’s school, come to hear music, and not do battle, we sure didn’t count on much --

OK, now, Seriously, why are “hippies” and Dave Mathew’s fans such assholes sometimes? You know, when we were being let in, a group of drunken (this is 11:30 am on a Sunday mind you) – of drunken buffoons kept yelling “TIMMMEH,” as in Timmy from South Park. Now, not to be too politically correct, but if there was ever a time NOT to yell that… Well, lets just say, I think those guys are going straight to hell for that one!



And here’s another fun shot. Baya Malay and I did not like the sun. Here we are hiding. The only vampire in a sea of folk music fans. And sadly, the vampire was the one photographing the rainbows.




The Blessing.



Some Performers.







Me watching a set & representing in my Celestial Banner Dress. Normally, one would feel bad, for the few people who’s view was obstructed by the banners, but in this case, I felt no guilt at all – given that crew behind me, spent much o the day smoking any thing they could shove into their pipes, and throwing tortillas. The regular tortillas, as Baya Malay and I overheard, don’t fly as good as whole wheat.” I of course, stupidly thought that the grain made no distance, when it came to aerodynamics of bread products, but apparently it does. Enough so that, these guys, even after being told by security, that the same tortillas launched ever so tastelessly prior to Reznor’s set – hit a child, were still upset that the tortillas they planned to launch later that evening, might not get the same height. Yeah so, I felt a little bad about that guy behind me having to lean to the left – but – for that kid who got hit… yeah not so much…



Then Baya Malay and I left for the usual post show craziness. (Someone remind me to post a follow up to my Demi post – the best story Baya Malay told me about Demi-Luke from one of her shifts!)





Everyone’s Grudge Becomes Everyone’s Hero...

San Francisco was great. It was great to get away from New York, and terribly great to get back into the field. As to rock star’s performance….. There are no words. The set was so well thought out and orchestrated . Everyone, even those who had not come to see him – constantly overheard how he stole the show. He did.

Fans came from Texas, all over Cali, New Jersey, New York and Wisconsin, and further I’m sure. Many fans were kind enough to offer spare beds, rides. And it was all beyond worth it. After so many years, so many records, and so many shows, somehow, he, never ceases to amaze us, and keep us on our toes…

I am so thankful to him, constantly inspiring me, even when I think I don’t want him to. He does this, he is such an inspiration everyone. And I am so grateful, for how this had brought us fans (most of us fans – not quite everyone!) together. I’ve met so many really cool, sweet people through this, many I now consider friends.

I am happy to be back home, and back from my break from art and Rock Star. Although, now, after such an incredible performance – all the kids wanna talk about is his new hair.

For the love of Peat -- It’s not like he’s sticking it on with D.A.R.H.M.A. brand theatrical glue!!!

San Francisco Day 3

Day 1 of The Bridge School Benefit.



Me on site





Photos take from the field.

Some of the performances:



Think that’s Death Cab for Cutie on stage there. Yeah even at a nice peaceful gig like this, a fist fight broke out just prior to one of the more well known acts. So, (Can I use real names here? I’m always afraid, my friends or the other fans will come across this site, see what I’ve written and kill me!) So, Hippo, totally had my back during the brawl. Hippo, I don’t know where you are girl, but it was both a joy and an honor to have experience that set with you and the others.



Breathe out
So I could breathe you in
Hold you in

And I wonder

When I sing along with you
If everything could ever feel this real forever
If anything could ever be this good again

The only thing I'll ever ask of you
You've got to promise not to stop when I say
when



Everyone’s Grudge Becomes Everyone’s Hero.



Calling base to De Vars, Sa Lews & Midsummer (though, technically, De Vars called me)



A video montage showing footage of many of the students. It was a very emotional night. I cried a lot. I shouldn’t admit that – a Gard shouldn’t really get that emotional. Certainly not a New York artist -- emotions are Highly unacceptable in that circle. Well, here are some before and after shots of my make up!





(strings, it would be stings, of course its strings - the Harp. ...time compresses further.....)



Return. Log in-catch a few hours of sleep....fluffy matress, dark night, sound of the Fog Horn.
I love it.

San Francisco Day 2

Photos from Day 2.



I took this one specially for Kym. Look Meam! Ugly Halloween!!!



This shot is of the SF MOMA. Yay, art. Art is cool.

Ok, enough art, art is so not as cool as riding cable cars and playing riotPod, even though it wishes it was.





Ok I really liked cable cars – they’re fucking awesome! I’d say we need them in NYC but we don’t fucking have hills.



So then I went to Pier 39 again, since this time I was wearing pants!

So….here’s some Official Celestial Gard gymnastics training!







You're staring at the sun-you're standing in the sea-your mouth is open wide-you're trying hard to breathe- -The water's at your neck-there's lightning in your teeth-your body's over me-
- Note the trees because
the - -dirt is temporary!

Now.

Not tomorrow.
Yesterday
Not tomorrow
It happens today,
The damage today, They fall on today
They beat on the outside
- And I'll stand by you

Now.



So then I went for a walk, and I thought for a second that I spotted some Tom Sanfords, but it totally wasn’t. No Tom.

Then I went back to my beach, sent some text messages to my peeps since the show was the next day – and I did some art work.





Ocean pulls me close, and whispers in my ear, the destiny I chose…





Ok, this guy does Rock Star art for real. Fucking unreal. He is known as the ballence artist. Check out his site at rock-on-rock-on.com.



Why - why
Why do you come around!?
-So very -
Much.......
You know it just brings you down -
It's just somehting
you can't touch!

What – what!
What of the quiet ones!?
--What of the
few...........
-Now fall down onto your knees -
- Show us all what you can do !

We - we
we came around
here...........
to see
if you
were well........
and there's nothing for you to fear -
Never
No one else!--

-----ANY ONE AT ALL!!!!!!!!!!

REDROVER-redrover we come - we crawl - to take you OVER.

San Francisco Day 1

I kinda never update my blog……I don’t know how everyone else manages to find the time to update these things every day. Ok back to San Francisco. Here’s pics from Day 1.



This is me, waiting to take the cable cars. It’s kinda like the NYC subway – if the subway was an above ground rollercoaster. If you look behind me, there’s a Gap. One of my little friends is responsible for the awesome windows for that store. It’s the second biggest Gap in the country. I wish I had a better photo – she did an awesome job setting up the “Red” windows.

More photos, taken around Pier 39:




California rescue me
Simultaneous release
California show your teeth - She's my priestess, I'm your priest



Love is a tower
Of strength to me
I am the shoreline
But you're the sea

You are a tower of
Strength to me
The darkening hour

You are.






Me, visiting Alcatraz.





This was a nice lil beach in front of Ghiradelli Square. People swim here every dayof the year no matter what the weather. Even on cold foggy gross days. Yeah, but when I was there, the Bay Area was having a lil Fall heat wave. The weather was sunny & warm. I was very happy.



Then it got dark, then things got interesting. Not posting those pics… save that for my next show.